Saturday, November 30, 2013

Just A Dream

Bismillah Al Rahman Al Rahim,

Unlike any other normal days, I usually deny the things that I don't wanna see, don't wanna know, just let them disappear and go. I put all of em in a tiny box, add wings to it and let it fly far far far away. I guess today is one of those days that the box came back to me. Given the option, a choice to open the box or not, I let my guards down. I let myself be vulnerable. I let it loose. 

Suffocated by the excruciating painful memories, I force myself to go to sleep. Then you came to me in my dream. I couldnt recognize you at first because the light was so bright even I reach out for my hand to protect my eyes from the bright white light. Without saying a word, you took my hand and brought me to this place by a river. 

It was like a journey, like walking back to the past, like a trance. I tried to remember you, I really tried but I cant seem to remember. "Don't you remember me?" that voice, it echoes in my head, and it reaches to my heart. As if you creep in my heart and knock on its door. Yes I remember you now. I remember you clearly. That person whom I deny. I was confused, partly I was happy, extremely happy to see someone that I was close before. Lots of story to share but at the same time I was afraid. Scared that you would leave me. My fears was right, you got up and left me there. I tried calling for your name, I tried to chase after you but my voice wont come out, my body wont move.

Everything went pitch black. I woke up catching up on air. The pain and suffering came. Each part of my body aches. My heart throbs. I could feel my blood gushes through my veins. It was a dream. It was just a dream.